Tuesday, Oct. 01, 2002 - 8:39 pm
I don’t think he will ever, ever know how every little thing he does to me, every thing he says to me, everytime I see him, I don’t think he’d realise how special those moments are (which is why I chose this particular layout). I just wish I was smart enough to actually go for him when I was 10, but then again, where would I be now?
I like the way he calls me jir-z. It’s so…different. Yet cool. And I don’t know. It makes me feel all tingly. I left my MSN Status as Online last night instead of Away when I was in bed and at 12am (this time, which is about 3pm in London) he started chatting to me. I WAS SO STUPID, I TURNED THE VOLUME DOWN SO I DIDN’T KNOW WHETHER ANYONE HAD STARTED CHATTING TO ME AND I WAS STILL AWAKE THAT TIME. Just imagine. He coulda asked me out. OMG he could’ve! That would’ve been awfully amazing. I like how little things like this makes me feel special. Because I do feel special, just because he knows I exist.
Oh. Well. I’ll stay up until 12 tonight and see if he comes on. If not, I’ll just fuckin’ email him because I still can’t find my mobile. I’ve searched EVERYWHERE. Ok, not everywhere which is the problem because I can’t seem to be stuffed to get my lazy ass off my bed/chair and just, like, SEARCH.
Gawd. I’m such a mess.
